You've come a long long long way baby....

Its been a while. Life has been kind. Expanding salaries and expanding waistlines. I wish those two were invwrsly proportional . Sigh :-(

Maximum City...

Before coming to Mumbai , it always intrigued me why people found this city so awesome. I always thought of Mumbai as a filthy, stinky, overpopulated place (still do), but this city has a charm of its own. Here are some of my initial observations and experiences in the "Maximum City"...

The Trains:

Move over WinZip ...the next breakthrough in compression technology is here!! Just one journey through the Mumbai locals during rush hour, and you'll know what I mean. What I’ve learnt is, that you don’t fight it; you just go with the flow. The crowd is like ocean currents, they will push you in, they will push you out at your station. All you have to do is stand on the platform, let go of all your inhibitions, and get ready for ride of your life. Every local train ticket here comes with a free complimentary massage included. You just have to travel at the peak hours to avail of the offer though. If you haven’t travelled in the Mumbai locals yet.. You are missing out on an experience of a lifetime!!


The Traffic:

Well, since I’ve been here ... I’ve almost got mowed down 3 times ( two rickshaws and one guy on a cycle . :-| ) . And this is probably the only place where a guy on a cycle actually manages to ride faster than a guy in a Merc. One great thing about traffic signals is... that they are unbiased. Doesn’t matter if you are driving a BMW, you still have to wait the same amount of time as the guy in a maruti 800 does. If you are a pedestrian here, you are shit outta luck!! It’s like every new day that you get is a god send for you... because you probably won’t survive till the next. Take your eyes off the road for one second, and you'll probably end up like that guy in the micromax phone advert. This is probably the only place where the news channels reach the scene before the police/ ambulance does...!!


The People:

It’s amazing to see how everyone is on a nonstop race against the clock. The way people try to squeeze 25 hours out of a 24 hour day. This is a city that never sleeps. Walk down the road at 4am, and you will still find rickshaw drivers ready to ferry you home, or the milk/newspaper delivery guys sorting out their wares. People in general are friendly here, but i really miss the whole "knowing everybody within 2 km radius" feel that I have in Goa. Over here, I don’t even know my next door neighbours name, let alone know what he does. It’s hectic and fast paced, but people have gotten used to the lifestyle… Sucked into the never ending vortex of work and more work. It’s a beautiful harmony of the different kegs required to keep this city rolling, right from the garbage picker, to the CEO of a MNC, everyone has their agenda for the day...And come what may it will not waver.



More to come....

A sad day this.....

Today was one of the most shocking days of my life. A colleague of mine at work,  who also happens to be a very good friend of mine was diagonised with a final stage brain tumor. The news came as a sudden shock to all of us in the team.  I mean. . just two days ago on the weekend he had called me up regarding some work related issue,  but unfortunatly I was out at that point of time and couldn't be of much assistance. And today... I hear about this shocking news from another colleague. So much can change in two days time... really makes you think at how little we control about our fate. The most unfortunate thing about the whole incident is that he had married over a year back and was just starting out in setting up his new home and family... and before ytou know it. .everything just comes crashing down. Its at times like these I really feel god is playing dice with the universe.  or else. .why would he have chosen him to have this fate... when 80 year old child molesters still walk the streets.  its just so wrong that someone just starting out with his life sould deserve this sentence. Today is really a sad day... and I will be hoping against hope for a miracle so that atleast some sort of a recovery is possible.  Please don't let me down God.....

Now that you're gone...

Pune in the rains.., originally uploaded by raymasky.

Now that you're gone ...


everything seems so gloomy once again ...


the skies aint that pretty no more...


and life is so full of pain ....!

Sittin wit friends..

Who blow their life up in smoke.. :-)

O' Buddy ... Where arth thou ??

It's just one of those days...A day when I feel like the entire world is caving in on me. Why ? Frankly I don't know.. I just feel this way sometimes. Its depressing ...really ..depressing . Its at times like these that i really miss having a "FRIEND". Now dont get me wrong.. I have oodles of friends ...(380+ on facebook and orkut when i last checked) ..But then ..there are friends ..and there are "friends"...!!

Let me go back a few years... When I was a kid ..I used to go to this fancy I.C.S.E school ..while all my friends from the village went to the local schools. This created a huge disconnect amongst us , and even though friends with all of them ...I never really got the opportunity to open up to them as much as i would have loved to. I was always viewed as elitist or that rich kid who goes to a fancy school !!

Then came college . I was full of my own problems in college. I was this grossly overweight kid who was viewed as a nerd by most people. Blending in with the "Oh-so-cool" crowd was never gonna happen ...and even though I made some good friends in college ..most of them were uber-geeks and were just friends because of the fact that we could exchange study notes etc.

Then I went to Grad school to study Computer Engineering. Grad school was fun , and as I was away from home I started to enjoy my new found freedom. But then ..I fell in love ...and fell hard. So out of the four years in college ..I was in a relationship with this girl for 3 years ...and that pretty much took up most of my time. I started ignoring people ..and spending most of my time with her...and this caused my friend list to take a serious beating.

Then we broke up...
And i realised ..that I was alone once more. But I was already out of college and working , and had little time to myself ..let alone for others. Which brings me to the point of this rant... I dont have any true friends , whom i think i can trust. All those who had the potential to be true friends over the years , have either faded away ..or are not in touch anymore. It's like asif i was in a coma all these years...and now i've suddenly woken up!! But the room is empty...There's nobody to help me out... Nobody to tell me that they're there for me..Nobody to help me walk again. I feel so alone and depressed...and worse than a prisoner in solitary confinement.

I'm the type of person who needs someone to talk to. I need someone to tell me that its all right , I need the love ..the attention ..the words of solace when i'm feeling down and low. I need someone to tell me that they have faith in me ...Someone who'll trust me unconditionally. I need a friend who I know will never ever spill out my deepest darkest secrets .. I need a friend who'll take a bullet for me . And if you think I'm being selfish here...you are wrong !! I'd do the same for my best friend too. I'd do every single thing and much more..!! I'd gladly give up all ny friends just for one person who truly understands the sea of randomness that is me. If only I had a true friend... If only.... :(

The ghost in me..

Sometimes.. i look into the mirror.. and all i see is the ghost in me.what have i become..? What have i turned my life into? Ever since i remember..all i wanted to do was stuff related to adventure and exploration.climbing mountains..exploring the paths less taken...going where no man has gone before (okay..i borrowed that last line from star trek), but today..even though i'm sitting here with this comfy desk job at a software company..and pretty happy..i still cant help thinking...Is this what i really want?do i just wanna go through my life being a slave of the system..? Believe me..its not the money..or the sense of self satisfaction..its just the yearning to unbelong.For instance..i've always wanted to escape..just take a ticket out of here and backpack across europe.. Or visit the temples of angkor vat..be mesmerized by the grandeur of the macchu picchu ruins..I wanna live with the monks in tibet.. Pitch a tent in the middle of the amazon rain forests..climb a mountain just so that i can scream out from the top of my lungs..even though i know no one's listening.I wanna do all this and much more..and yet..when it comes to making a decision..i get cold feet.I start thinking about the present..and how such plans could affect my future.Its what i've become..conditioned to this life..safe inside my security blanket. And happily chained to my office desk.I wish i could break free..i really wish i could..but the saneness (or is it?) in me prevails.these dreams take a backseat..with the hope that one day..i'll be determined enough to follow my instincts and do what i always wanted to do.And i just hope that day isn't too far away..